Posted on

How I’ve dealt with my amputations, how I’ve moved on

My life has been filled with medical problems, every stage of my life has been filled with going to the hospital, going to the doctors, and hospital stays. It hasn’t broken me yet.

Of all the medical problems I’ve had my two amputations stick out to me the most, mainly it took the most out of me.

When I was 28 I did something so stupid it change my life forever and not in a positive way.

Back at my old apartment, I had a guy who lived right across the hall from me knock on my door and was very belligerent.

So one day I decided to file a police report. The police station was right next to my apartment building. I could just push my wheelchair over there. Nothing wrong with that, right? The problem was that I decided to get cocky.

My next-door neighbor asked me if I wanted her to give me a ride to the police station. There was a problem with that, here’s the way.

You see my neighbor had an electric wheelchair at the time and I had a manual wheelchair so she asked me if I wanted her to give me a ride over there and I said yes let’s do it so I did it. The problem was I was barefooted so I was holding on to the back of her wheelchair while she drove to the police station next door while I was dragging my feet on the cement meanwhile they were getting cut and bleeding and as soon as I got to the police station and filed my complaint the officer looked down and said you’re bleeding so I ended up going to the hospital right there from the police station to get my feet checked out my next door neighbor took my wheelchair and my keys to lock my apartment and she kept my wheelchair until I got out of the hospital.

I truly believe that was the demise of my first amputation because a few months later I ended up with a black deep on the back of my foot.

That whole year I was in and out of the hospital in and out of the nursing home because it would not heal I missed out on so much that year I missed out on holidays I had a website that I was trying to manage I missed out on that I liked going to high school basketball games I missed out on that as well all because I was in and out of the hospital in and out of nursing homes until finally I said forget this I’m just need to amputate it because it’s not healing that was one of the toughest decisions I ever had to make in my entire life.

Leading up to that incident I did not take good care of my feet I often would go without wearing socks or shoes and people used to tell me you’re going to lose your feet I didn’t take that seriously I was in my twenties which I guess you could say I was cocky and didn’t think too much of it well I paid for it afterward psychologically.

I lost a lot of my confidence because of that amputation it took a lot out of me psychologically because I’ve been through so much before that incident that that incident alone just took the cake for me it sucked.

When I first got my foot amputated I couldn’t look in the mirror and I couldn’t look at the amputation right away it didn’t hurt because I was already paralyzed and I can’t feel my feet and some of my legs so I was thankful for that just the fact that I didn’t have those limbs anymore hurt me deeply mainly because I have already been through so much in my life before that.

Little did I know a couple of years after my first amputation I would have to go through a second amputation which was less painful psychologically but still sucked I remember one day my mom was cleaning my apartment with my caregiver and she was doing my dressing on my left foot which I still had no amputations on and she looked at my foot and smelled it and she was like John your foot smells bad so I ended up going to the emergency room and instead of going in and out of the hospital in and out of nursing homes I just wanted to amputate it right away because I knew that It would be a long haul and I already was in my thirties so I decided to amputate the toes it wasn’t as bad of amputation as the last one but I still had an amputation.

For my first amputation I was in the hospital and then transferred to a nursing home for about 3 weeks my second amputation ended up staying in the hospital for Inpatient Rehab for about a month it was bad because, after the second amputation, I ended up having complications from the antibiotics that they had me on I almost went into kidney failure.

Rehab was tough and both situations for different reasons.

It’s been over a decade since my amputations and I have an electric wheelchair now which helps with bed sores which I desperately need help with.

After my amputations I struggled with doing something as far as work is concerned from home I’ve tried websites and podcasts they haven’t worked so now I’m right this blog hoping to get notarized and people to follow my blog so I can reach more people.

Coping with bad stuff that happens to you isn’t easy.

I feel like people should cope with their amputations by doing what they like to do it doesn’t matter what it is just do something I find it easy to deal with by watching comedy I feel like everybody needs to laugh I feel like laughter is a good medicine it keeps your mind off things also doing other things as well that’s why I started this blog is to keep my mind off the crap that goes on in the world.

Just because bad things happen doesn’t mean you have to stop living try to push yourself as much as possible that’s not saying you should jump out of a plane just try to do things that make you happy I feel everybody deserves to be happy not everybody thinks that way but that’s just what I believe in.

One of the things that keeps me sane is working out I do it for anxiety I don’t necessarily do it for strength I do it for strength but that’s not the only reason I do it because it’s good for anxiety and it helps me concentrate.

I would encourage somebody who had amputations done to just go out there and try something or figure out what you like and start doing it you’ll feel so much better.

Discover more from John Sikon Writes

Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.